Coaching is about winning. Why else is there a scoreboard.
This was the year. Troy High School’s girls varsity soccer team had knocked us out of the playoffs more than any other team. If we had a nemesis it was them.
This year, all of their top players had graduated and they just did not have any talent left. We, we were at the top of our game. We were ranked, we were undefeated, and we were finally going to destroy our rivals!
Before the game began, Troys girls were giggling and goofing around. They looked like a junior varsity, not the returning state champions. I scoffed. I had my girls focused and ready to win.
The whistle blew and the war began. They ran at us. They chased every ball. The fought for every play. In the end we won 1-0, but it was one of the toughest games we had ever played.
I could not believe it. We won, but I felt deeply humbled. I thought the Troy girls won because of talent, but here they were with no talent and it took everything to eek out a win.
I pulled their head coach aside. I had to know…how? How did he get this group of rag tag players to play so hard.
I still can not believe he told me his secret to coaching…
He said, “I don’t coach them to win. I don’t focus on what they don’t have. I don’t focus on their weaknesses. I FOCUS ON THEIR STRENGTHS AND BUILD FROM THERE.”
He went on, “This team doesn’t have talent, but they have heart. They like to have fun and they love each other. So I build on that. I don’t care if they win, I coach them to love the game and love each other.”
THIS! This is the key to all coaching. To all leadership.
Do NOT focus on weakness, FOCUS ON BUILDING FROM STRENGTH.
I have used this everyday since. As a coach. As a teacher. As a parent. As a leader. Build from strength.
Fear makes us focus on proving ourselves with wins. Courage makes us focus on seeing the potential of others.
When I look back on my life now I see how this simple piece of wisdom changed everything. I still lose focus. I still get caught up on wins or on how others perceive me. But now, I remember to build from strength. For myself and for those in my life. And this…changes everything.
I hope today you can focus on your strengths. Remember who you truly are at your core. What do you love? Where do you come alive? Where are you at your best?
And build from there!